So yet again.. my paranoia is unfounded... for the moment...
and I find myself in a better mood.. somewhat...
However.. I find myself in a bit of a pickle... oohh pickles..
Where to start.. what to use as "inspiration"...
I'm a basket case.. I'm manic and bi polar and freaking outta my mind a good portion of the time..
there is a eternal raging storm that takes place in my mind... well maybe not raging..
and perhaps not eternal.. let's just say I have a 24/7 hurricane season inside my mind..
I have months of calm clear weather and then wham!!! a cat 5 Katrina comes slamming in.. well maybe not a cat 5 per se.. I have not had one of those in a while but I do get fairly worked up and fairly belligerent....
So what the "bipolar" moment... well.. so i'd been paranoid about my job.. shittin egg rolls so to speak,,, and desperately seeking for new employment.. to which.. I don't think is going to happen.. at least anytime soon...
too which my paranoid "embolism" has now passed and I feel a bit more secure in my job.. more so than yesterday or last Friday...
I've made numerous attempts to "relax".. to mellow.. to "maintain"... (shit stain)...
However I find myself.. YET AGAIN!! drawn to the world of food..
and in fact reading the Julie/Julia Project
I've seen the movie.. why... because I love food.. I love cooking... I love that how one things can single handily make me feel enormous elation or tremendous let down... it sustains me.. it makes me feel good when a hastily thought out recipe turn out... surprisingly good... I'm amazed at how clever Julie is.. sooo much more than Amy Adams....
I've enamored with her quick wit and especially with her obvious topic of choice... food.
This has given me some renewed "perspective" (which is a take from Ratatouille - I'd like some fresh perspective)
Any who.... I've gotten a renewed determination on food.. however.. to do something new... something different.... something inspired from those before me.. perhaps a video blog..It'll be easier to put my thoughts down on "tape" perhaps.. lets see how it works....
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
First I cringe at this writing and those other 2010 blog posts of mine. Though rabbit trailing on the J/J link.. It reminded me of that time frame and reading these other posts. Then remembering that Julie died last year. So this is gonna sound a bit weird but I see one's life as the totality of their experiences and when other people whether direct or indirectly are a part die... for me it seems like a part of me has died or that it's also the telling of my days and that they are fleeting.
ReplyDelete